Wedding Dress Shopping During Recovery
Wedding Dress Shopping During Your Recovery
Ahhhh wedding planning…for some women it is a blissful time while others find it torturous. Full disclosure I am not a wedding planner, but I am a dietitian and recent bride. I bring this up because I wanted to share with you a story that absolutely wowed me as an eating disorder professional during my wedding planning year. During one of my many dressing-fitting appointments, a personal trainer arrived to the dress shop and attempted to drop off some business cards. He spoke with the manager and he tried to sell her how women are trying to lose weight and look good. She simply stated that she was not interested and he understood and left. That moment spoke to me and I wish there were more ladies to witness it. The manager gave a confident answer without saying it, that this bridal shop was a safe place where any bride to be can be herself and not change a damn thing. I’m going to make it my goal by the end of this year to thank this manager for her poise and professional response.
Society puts pressure on that we must look our absolute best for our wedding day and fit into that dress. Yes, the dress! Many women go through dieting and exercise extremes. Some buy a dress purposely multiple sizes too small. I remember teachers in high school going through dramatic body transformation before the big day, and then gaining the weight post wedding and them some. In grad school, one of my classmates shared the story of how distant relatives asked her if she lost weight for the wedding. She replied “no” with a confused look because this was always her body. Not everyone is trying to lose weight before the wedding. Diet culture is everywhere but there are wedding professionals, treatment team members, friends and family that do give sound advice.
I want to share some of these tips for those that are struggling with their body image or in the process of their eating disorder recovery. Every tip may not be right for you but it is something to ponder on.
Buy the dress that makes YOU feel confident and comfortable. Don’t force it.
Be open to trying on dresses that you may not have imagined, the most random things will surprise you
Have a supportive and small entourage for the dress experience
Don’t focus on the dress size. Depending on the designer your size may very a lot to a little. Who cares about the number!
If you are at a place in your recovery where you can’t see the dress size or your measurements in inches have a loved on talk ahead with the dress shop and remind them to block out this information on your receipts. You may need to remind the shop multiple times. I think shying away from the size or measurements is a form of avoidance, but it may be necessary to get through this phase of your recovery
Keep statements neutral when you face the mirror. Not every dress is going to work with your body type or look flattering and that’s ok!
Plan something fun with you bride tribe after your dress experience. You can celebrate that you said, “Yes, to the dress!” or plan your next shopping date.
If you aren’t buying directly off the rack many dresses take up to 6 months to be made/shipped. Plan accordingly.